Filed by an anonymous lobby tipster, reporting from the lobby.

The lobby’s latest therapy session kicked off when skewl dropped the bombshell: some poor sap was bankrolling her ex’s lavish lifestyle, and not because he was hot. Oh no—Charades swooped in with the psychoanalysis, whispering that the guy’s “daddy problem” and NPD made him a master manipulator, turning a rich girl into his personal ATM. Sources say she wasn’t the only one; another “lady” allegedly got the same treatment before getting booted in July. Classy.

Meanwhile, SemperZombie was pissed—not at the narcissist, but at the ex for dumping two Sphynx cats like yesterday’s trash. “Shitty animal abuser,” they hissed, detailing how the poor hairless beasts were screamed at and neglected. BonnieP, ever the opportunist, begged to take them off her hands, because nothing says “I care” like adopting pets from a drama queen’s dumpster fire.

Troyuz tried to lighten the mood with a bizarre tale of a girl in a pink jacket who nearly drowned, but let’s be real—no one was listening. The chat was too busy dissecting Charades’ claim that some underage creep was hooking up with an engaged teacher back in 2018. “Disgusted” doesn’t even cover it, darling.

“She hasn’t matured it would seem,” Charades clucked, allegedly offering up her grandparents’ home like it’s a timeshare. Jesus, indeed.

Doofus summed it up best: “Insane Chat People.” Truer words were never typed. And packit, bless their heart, insisted they only hang with “positive” folks—though saaflahndan wasn’t buying it, calling BonnieP “nasty” with a side of “ew.” The lobby’s moral compass? Spinning faster than a Sphynx in a bathtub.

— XOXO, EpikChat News